The Things You Can See Only When You Slow Down

Our reality is not the infinitely stretching cosmos but the small part we choose to focus on. Reality exists because our minds exist.

When you have an unpleasant feeling, don’t grab hold of it and turn it over and over. Instead, leave it alone so it can flow. The wave of emotion will naturally recede on its own as long as you don’t feed it by dwelling on it.

From time to time we should take a breath and notice the silence between sounds.

Imagine that a strong negative emotion is like mud swirling inside a fish tank. To get the mud to sink to the bottom of the tank so you can have a clear view of the fish, the last thing you want to do is submerge your hands in the muddy water and try to push the mud to the bottom. The more you try to push it down, the more you churn it up. Similarly, in an attempt to control a negative emotion, you may try to push it down. Unfortunately, the harder you try, the more it resurfaces.

How can you tell if someone is truly enlightened? Shower him with both praise and criticism. If he shows signs of being susceptible to either, then it means he has forgotten his enlightened nature.

A person does not live the way he says he would. He lives the way he has been living.

No matter how hurt you are, you don’t need to have the last word. The last word can obliterate even the good memories.

The flaw that you immediately notice in someone you meet is probably a flaw of yours, too. If you didn’t have it, you wouldn’t have noticed it so quickly. No one is inherently good or bad. Only the circumstance in which we encounter each other is good or bad. A criminal who happens to stop a car from running over me is an angel sent by God. A Nobel Peace Prize winner who happens to bump into me on the subway is a jerk.

An exceptional relationship is not one with a good beginning but one with a good ending. Relationships often begin accidentally, but when it comes to ending them, we usually have choices.

When we are in love, we like to do nice things for the one we love. But it is equally important to refrain from doing unnecessary things. We often overlook that part.

By complaining that something we have to do is too hard, we add another layer of difficulty. Take a deep breath, and then just do it.

If you are raising a child, then remember this: It is okay for your child to do well in one area and not so well in others. A restaurant specializing in a few good dishes is more likely to develop a good reputation than one with a lengthy menu. Help your child go deep in her area of interest